What do you do if your bank account stops working?

Throw the guy out of the house.

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What did the mother snake say to her crying baby ?

Stop crying and viper your nose !

How do you stop ISIS?

Leave some milk in the sun for a few days.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What do you call an Autobot who works in an overpriced makeup store at the mall ?

Ulta Magnus!

What did George Michael say to his partner before he went to work?

Wake me up before you go-go

House Jokes More House Jokes

What's the cutest part of a house?

The awning. I know, I'm sorry.

Whats the difference between a burglar and an ex-wife?

At least the burglar has the decency to leave you the house.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

How do you know if a guy has an asian wife?

He'll tell you.

What did they say about the guy who woke up and jerked off on his alarm clock every day?

He always came on time.

Throw Jokes More Throw Jokes

Why did I throw my phone out of my window?

Because I turned on airplane mode, and thought it would turn my Iphone into a plane...

Why did the undercover cop throw a wasp nest at the drug dealer?

It was a sting operation.