What do you do if your bank account stops working?

Throw the guy out of the house.

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all your booze?

You invite two of them.

What's the difference between Phil Collins and Germany?

We stopped Germany.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Where is the best place for a 1-legged waitress to work?

IHOP

How did the stem cell break it to his girl?

It's not you it's me*iosis* Could probably do with some work on deliver as I made it 5 minutes ago

House Jokes More House Jokes

What kind of house is easiest to pick up?

A: A light house.

Why didn't Beethoven sell his house?

He put it up Fur Elise!

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

Why can't an IT guy be a doctor?

Nurse: Doctor, the patient's life support is acting strange. . . Doctor: Have you tried turning it off and on again?

What did they say about the guy who woke up and jerked off on his alarm clock every day?

He always came on time.

Throw Jokes More Throw Jokes

How do you conufuse a blond?

Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

What to do when a blonde throws a grenade at you... What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?

Pull the pin and throw it back.