What do you get when you put a car and a pet together ?

Carpet !

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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What did the car say when it's front wheels were stolen?

I don't want to go anywhere. I'm two tired.

What kind of cars do shellfish drive?

Mussel cars.

Carpet Jokes More Carpet Jokes

What did the carpet say to the floor?

Don't move -- I've got you covered.

What STD is found most commonly among lesbians?

Carpet burn

Pet Jokes More Pet Jokes

What happens when you pet a cat in the opposite direction?

You rub them the wrong way

How about pets?

That's fine" dog walks in and lights up "We'll take it"