Carpet Jokes

Where does the Persian air force keep its aircraft?

The Carpet store

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What is a snowman's favorite kind of carpet?

BRRR BRRR

What did the carpet enthusiast say to his mistress?

I haven't had hard wood in 15 years.

What's the difference between Java and JavaScript?

Java and JavaScript are similar in the same way car and carpet are.

Why when you spill red wine on a carpet do you take the stain out with white wine?

Because more alcohol is the solution to all problems.

What do you call it when a dog craps on your rug?

Carpet bombing.

What type of carpet do you put in an igloo?

Burr-burr

What do you call a skinned, animal-throwrug for your vehicle?

A carpet.

What do you call a Pixar film about Carpets?

A Rug's Life.

What do Mexicans put under their carpet?

Underlay! Underlay!

Why does carpet never make a sound?

It's the world's quietest pervert.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What did the Mexican put under his carpet?

Underlay! Underlay!

What STD is found most commonly among lesbians?

Carpet burn

What do you call a cute little animal you keep in your automobile?

A: A carpet.

What does Speedy Gonzalez keep under his carpet?

Underlay! Underlay!

What did Shakespeare say when his dog messed up the carpet?

Out, damned spot! Out, I say!"*

How did Aladdin die?

Carpet bombing.

What do Mexican's put under their carpet?

Underlay

What did the carpet say to the floor?

Don't move -- I've got you covered.

Why did the moth nibble a hole in the carpet ?

He wanted to see the floor show !

Why do carpets in white folk houses always need vacuuming?

Crackers always leave crumbs.

Why did the guy cut a hole in his carpet?

He wanted to watch the floor show. And why did he cover it back up ...He realized that he didn't want to watch the "hole" show.

What do you get when you put a car and a pet together ?

Carpet !

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What do you call a WordPress website that dresses up like another type of website?

DruPal

What type of currency do people use in outer space?

STARbucks.

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What happens when someone spills really hot coffee on you?

You will get burned, you idiot.

What happened to the hippy chemistry teacher when he spilled his chemicals?

He tripped on acid

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How does an Eskimo build his house?

Igloos it together.

What type of carpet do you put in an igloo?

Burr-burr

Alcohol Jokes More Alcohol Jokes

What type of alcohol do they put in bomb shots?

Allah-lcohol

What do you call someone who randomly shows up and drinks your alcohol?

Bill Murray.

Rug Jokes More Rug Jokes

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day?

Rugs and kisses!

How does Spongebob cut a rug?

With a square Dance!

Lay Jokes More Lay Jokes

How's your love life?

Well, I went on a date. 45 minutes in I realized it was a turtle in a wig. "I'm sorry man" it's ok. still got laid.

What did the baby chick say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange ?

Dad dad look what marma-laid' !

Java Jokes More Java Jokes

What did the Java code say to the C code?

You've got no class.

What's the difference between Java and JavaScript?

Java and JavaScript are similar in the same way car and carpet are.

Problem Jokes More Problem Jokes

What is your Problem?

Darren : Suffering from Unlimited Free Outgoings with Different Different Ringtones...:-):-D

Why did the ghost go into rehab?

He had a problem with boos.