What does an accountant say when you ask him the time?

It's 9.18 am and 12 seconds no wait - 13 seconds no wait - 14 seconds no wait......

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Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did the pig do when a beetle landed in his feed trough?

He ate it quickly before the others could ask him to share.

What makes fish smell?

One fine morning in Eden, God was looking for Eve, but couldn't find them. God saw Adam and asked where Eve was? Adam replied, "She's down at the Ocean, taking a bath." "Damn," says God, "now all the fish will smell."

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

How do you find a British person in a crowd?

1. Shout 0800 00 2. Wait for them to shout 1066.

Whenever I get to a restaurant and they say there is a wait I say "do you know who I am?

because while I wait I like to be introspective

Accountant Jokes More Accountant Jokes

What's it called when a super model wants to date an accountant?

Wishful thinking. Obviously

Why do accountants get excited on Saturdays?

They can wear casual clothes to work

13 Second Jokes More 13 Second Jokes

What does $50 get you at the Chanel store?

13 seconds of eye contact.

What does an accountant say when you ask him the time?

It's 9.18 am and 12 seconds no wait - 13 seconds no wait - 14 seconds no wait......