What if I buried it in the yard?

me, genuinely, earlier today. Wife said no.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What're you doing in the garage?

ME: I made a cloning machine. WIFE: Don't do anything stupid. OTHER ME: Like what

What's the difference between a gun and a wife?

You can silence a gun.

Bury Jokes More Bury Jokes

Why was the Scotsman buried on the hill?

He died.

Why is it illegal for a person living in Virginia to be buried in Texas?

because they're still alive.

Yard Jokes More Yard Jokes

How do you keep black people out of your back yard?

Hang one in the front!

What do you do when you see your neighbour staggering in the back yard?

Shoot him again.