What is a caffeine addict's excuse for drinking coffee in the evening?

It's 8:00 somewhere!

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What do you call a pirate who is lost at sea and has to drink his own pee to survive?

Aarrrrrrr Kelly!

Why dont Calculus majors throw house parties?

Because you should never drink and derive.

800 Jokes More 800 Jokes

Why did the spud lover set his alarm for 8:00?

Because he wanted to get a-po-ta-to clock. to make joke more apparent

What's the rule for Twitter crushes?

So far I'm in love with 800 women, 2 dudes, and a llama. Send condoms.

Evening Jokes More Evening Jokes

What do romantic fish sing to each other?

Salmon-chanted evening !

What losses its head in the morning and gets it back in the evening?

A pillow