What's the rule for Twitter crushes?

So far I'm in love with 800 women, 2 dudes, and a llama. Send condoms.

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2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

What did 2 say to 3 about 6?

Oh don't mind him, he's just the product of our times!

What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?

Pregnant.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What did Helen Keller say after she finished her bowl of cereal for breakfast?

I may be blind, but I can see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

How do you know Sia is Scottish?

Because she loves sheep thrills! *shows self out

Twitter Jokes More Twitter Jokes

Where're you going?

Me: To dinner with my friends! Mom: Your friends Me: I'm going to use McDonalds' free Wifi to get on twitter...

Why does Brendon Rodgers hate Twitter?

It only allows 140 characters

Condom Jokes More Condom Jokes

What happens when you put a condom inside another condom?

Conception

How do you put a condom on a elephant?

You take the c out of ice and the f out of weigh.

Send Jokes More Send Jokes

Why did the terrorist cross the road?

To send people to the other side.

Why couldn't the apple send an e-mail to the orange?

Because the lime was engaged.

800 Jokes More 800 Jokes

Why did the spud lover set his alarm for 8:00?

Because he wanted to get a-po-ta-to clock. to make joke more apparent

What's the rule for Twitter crushes?

So far I'm in love with 800 women, 2 dudes, and a llama. Send condoms.

Rule Jokes More Rule Jokes

What's the first rule for hitting on girls?

Hit them where it won't show.

Why does pokemon have only one save file per game?

I mean think about it, One for Charmander One for Squirtle and one for your second charmander. (found that but it's against rules to post links lol so I'll just leave that here for a good laugh)

Llama Jokes More Llama Jokes

What does one llama say to the other llama before the smoke some weed?

Alpaca bowl!!!

What does a llama do when it goes on holidays?

Alpaca ya bags.