What is your secret weapon against terrorists?

We simply reply......Chuck Norris

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What do terrorists and the American government have in common?

They both blow up people who don't agree with them.

What kind of buildings do terrorists have on their farms?

Allahu akbarns (I'm going to hell)

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Why is Chuck Norris still alive?

Credit: Saw the comment in this 1:55

Who has more testicles?

contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.

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What do you do for a living?

The engineer replies " I make chips" "Oh yummy!"

What width?

She replied: "with scissors of course."