What's a meth head's favourite thing about Halloween?

Only two more sleeps till Christmas!

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Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What do you call a seagull that catches you sleeping?

A baegull.

What should you do if you find a 500-pound dog asleep on your bed?

Sleep on the sofa.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

Why can't a Christmas tree walk?

Because it ." "Ugh, that's so ."

Why is Santa always so jolly?

Because he knows where all the naughty girls live. You've probably heard this one before. But it's Christmas tomorrow so what the hell.

Halloween Jokes More Halloween Jokes

How can you tell when Halloween is coming too soon?

The sight of premature Ejack-o-lanterns in the neighborhood. I'm a Dad so this joke is OK

What did the jalapeno dress up as for Halloween?

A Ghost Pepper.