What's the best way to get your guitar player to turn down the volume?

Give him the sheet music.

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What do you call a symphony where everyone plays at the same time instead of taking turns?

An chestra.

Why did Chewbacca turn down Princess Leia?

She doesn't Swallowbacca.

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What's the best way to make friends?

tell a woman you love her and she says "i think we're just friends..."

What is the best way for a pet shop to get business?

Word of mouse.

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How Am I Doing?

I'll Tell You How I'm Doing Volumes: 1-8

What is the volume of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?

One US Leader

Guitar Player Jokes More Guitar Player Jokes

How do you get a guitar player to shut up?

Put sheet music in front of him

What's the difference between a guitar player and a pizza?

A pizza can feed a family of four.

Sheet Music Jokes More Sheet Music Jokes

Why did the zombie start ripping up sheet music?

Because he was de-composing.

What's the best way to get your guitar player to turn down the volume?

Give him the sheet music.