Sheet Music Jokes

How do you get a guitar player to shut up?

Put sheet music in front of him

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How do you get a guitar player to turn down his amp?

Give him sheet music.

How do you confuse a drummer?

Give him sheet music

What's the best way to get your guitar player to turn down the volume?

Give him the sheet music.

Why did the zombie start ripping up sheet music?

Because he was de-composing.

Why did the composer spend all his time in bed?

He wrote sheet music.

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What's the difference between Jesus &amp a picture of Jesus?

It only takes one nail to hang the picture.

How many 1980s R &amp?

B divas does it take to fix a broken lightbulb? Just one, but they fix the crack by torchlight

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What spends a good 3 hours a day in my hand?

hint* it starts with P and ends with S. Pens! :D ... wait what were YOU THINKING ! ! !

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Leeeeeetttttssss get rrrrrrrrrready to Buuuuuuummmmmmmmmmbbbbbbllllllleeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!"

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I'll be Bach.

What do composers prepare their ingredients on?

A Chopin board

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What would you get if Geddy Lee, Neil Peart and Alex Lifeson all died in a plane crash?

Take your time, there's no Rush...

Why was the school principal not pleased when he bumped into an old friend ?

They were both driving their cars at the time !

Shut Jokes More Shut Jokes

How do you shut up a deaf person?

Punch them in the hands.

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Well dear... Every time I ask you to close the windows you answer with "Please wait while your computer shuts down"...

Volume Jokes More Volume Jokes

What is the volume of a disk with radius z and height a?

Pi * z * z * a

How Am I Doing?

I'll Tell You How I'm Doing Volumes: 1-8

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How did I get the balls to write such a grotesque joke?

Gruesome.

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Exorcise books.

Zombie Jokes More Zombie Jokes

Why shouldn't you hang out with zombies?

They make rotten friends

Why did the stressed out zombie go on vacation?

He needed some time to himself to decompose.