What's the difference between an onion and a woman?

I cry when I cut open an onion

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a bad mechanic and a politician?

With the mechanic, there's a shot something might get fixed...

What's the difference between the standard alphabet and Christmas alphabet?

There's Noel.

Cry Jokes More Cry Jokes

What's funnier than a crying baby?

A dead baby.

How do you react when looking in the mirror?

You cry because you shoved a cactus up your peckar.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

Why don't women fart?

They can't shut up long enough to build up pressure.

How do you blind a woman?

You put a windshield in front of her.

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

What do onions and people have in common?

I weep uncontrollably when I cut them.

Why is the oval office oval shaped?

Because the government cuts corners.

Onion Jokes More Onion Jokes

Why did the man cry when he was cutting up onions?

Onions" was his dog... D:

What's the difference between a bagpipe and an onion?

A: No one cries when you cut up a bagpipe.