What's the difference between me and my couch?

My couch pulls out.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a banana and a helicopter?

You can helicopter your banana but you can't banana your helicopter

What's the difference between a gun and a wife?

You can silence a gun.

Couch Jokes More Couch Jokes

Why would you be scared to get Ebola?

You haven't left your couch since 2011.

What does the hippie bum say when you tell him he can no longer sleep on your couch?

Namaste

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

Why is it so hard to pull over on the Pirate Highway?

Because there's a parrot on the shoulder.

Why are fire trucks always red?

You'd turn red if someone pulled on your hose wouldn't you?