Why would you be scared to get Ebola?

You haven't left your couch since 2011.

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?

Russell

Why are hurricanes named after women?

Because they arrive wet and wild then leave with your house and car

Couch Jokes More Couch Jokes

How much do you bench?

Me: Way less than I couch.

What is the difference between me and my couch?

My couch pulls outs

Ebola Jokes More Ebola Jokes

What do you call a bowl on the internet?

Ebola

What do you call a paraplegic with Ebola?

A parabola.