What is the difference between leaves and a car?

One you brush and rake, the other you rush and brake.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a thief and a church bell?

One steals from the people the other peals from the steeple.

Whats the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus?

One has a moustache and smells of fish and the other is a walrus.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Where can you find a paraplegic man?

Right where you left him.

Why did Prince Eric leave Ariel when she became a human?

He was just chasing tail.

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

Why do elephants prefer cars instead of motorcycles?

motorcycles don't have trunks

Why did the man put his car in the oven?

Because he wanted a hot rod.

Http Jokes More Http Jokes

What is recursion?

What is recursion (http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/211omr/whatisrecursion/)

If I had to guess the religion of Daniel Day Lewis...

I would probably say Methodist.

Brush Jokes More Brush Jokes

What do you call thrusting a hairy rod in and out of your mouth really fast then afterwards spitting out a white liquid?

Brushing your teeth

What can you sit on, sleep on, and brush your teeth with?

A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush.

Brake Jokes More Brake Jokes

What did Kurtis Blow tell his son when teaching him how to drive?

THESE are the brakes!

What is the difference between leaves and a car?

One you brush and rake, the other you rush and brake.

Source Jokes More Source Jokes

What is the Taliban's favorite holiday footwear?

Missile Toe!

What do you get when you buy a $5 umbrella?

Wet.

Rake Jokes More Rake Jokes

How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?

She fell out of the tree! I may not be a girl, but I'm blonde and find blonde jokes hilarious. xD

How did the blonde break her leg from raking the leaves?

She fell out of the tree.

Rush Jokes More Rush Jokes

What do you call an imp that is rushes to the hospital?

Impatient OC from r/dadjokes

Why was the peanut rushed to the hospital?

He was a"salted"