Why can't you use sarcasm with a kleptomaniac?

Because they take things literally.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What kind of money do snowmen use?

Iced lolly.

What's the difference between LinkedIn and McDonald's?

McDonald's knows how to use salt

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What do you call a Russian wearing a head scarf, a balaclava and a helmet?

Anything you want. He can't hear a thing.

How has society let things go so far down hill that it still takes two minutes to make popcorn?

China probably can pop corn in one minute.

Sarcasm Jokes More Sarcasm Jokes

Why can't you use sarcasm with a kleptomaniac?

Because they take things literally.

Why do thieves have such a hard time understanding sarcasm?

They take things literally

Kleptomaniac Jokes More Kleptomaniac Jokes

Why is it so hard to explain metaphors to a kleptomaniac?

Because they always take things... Literally

Why did the kleptomaniac spend so much time in Bed Bath and Beyond?

He was taking a sheet.