Why couldn't the American leave Russia?

He was snowden

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How much time do I have left, doctor?

Doctor: 10 Guy: 10 what ! 10 days, 10 months, 10 years Doctor: 9...8...7...6...5...

Why did you leave your previous job?

ME: Because once they fire you they won't let you stay.

American Jokes More American Jokes

What's the best way for an American to lose weight?

Gamble in British currency.

How do we know that Darth Vader is American?

Because he marches to the Imperial March and not the Metric March

Russia Jokes More Russia Jokes

Why can't Russia extradite US top-secret whistle-blowers?

Because they're Snowden (snowed-in). To all the folks on the East coast, stay safe and warm.

Why did the US Informant get stuck in Russia?

He was snowed-in.