Why did the Scotsman sell drugs?

He had to get plaid.

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Drug Jokes More Drug Jokes

Why shouldn't you give Muslim Women drugs?

They'll get stoned. (Ba-dum tss)

What is a drug?

A drug is a substance which when injected into a guinea pig produces a scientific paper.

Sell Jokes More Sell Jokes

How many stockholders does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.

Why did Bernie Sanders's chicken restaurant throw out so much food?

He only sold left wings.

Scotsman Jokes More Scotsman Jokes

What's the difference between a Scotsman and the Rolling Stones?

The Rolling Stones say 'hey you, get off my cloud.' the Scotsman says 'hey MaCleod, get off my ewe.'

What did the Scotsman say when he ripped his trousers?

Och noo, me troosers!