Why didn't the blond call 911?

She couldn't find the 11 on the dial pad.

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How did the farmer find his lost cow?

He tractor down

How do you find a velociraptor?

By taking the integral of the acceleraptor!

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What would have happened if asians had committed the attacks of 9/11?

10/11 with rice, thanks for your suggestion

What's worse than 9/11?

311 Credit goes to my friend Max.

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Why did the blond get fired from the boomerang factory?

She threw away all the bent ones. Why did she get re-hired They all came back.

Why did the blond quit his restroom attendant job?

A: He couldn't figure out how to refill the hand dryer!

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Why the patriots deflated 11 balls out of 12?

because they knew the "12" will be deflated during/after Superbowl.

What was the end scored?

Player: "1:1"