Why did Dracula miss lunch?

Because he didn't fancy the stake.

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Miss Jokes More Miss Jokes

How do you know when you are too drunk to drive?

When you swerve to miss a tree and then realise it was your air freshener..

Why do they put half of the instructions in Spanish?

It drives me crazy. I feel like I am missing out on important information. They should put the whole thing in one language.

Lunch Jokes More Lunch Jokes

How did Metallica get their band name?

They Bonded over lunch.

Where to, the Caribbean or Hawaii?

Me: No, this is just my lunch.

Stake Jokes More Stake Jokes

Why did the short vampire like to gamble?

Because the stakes were high!

Why does Dracula always travel with his coffin?

Because his life is at stake.

Dracula Jokes More Dracula Jokes

Why did Dracula's mother give him cough syrup?

Because Dracula was coffin. Source: A Laffy Taffy wrapper.

What did the spectator say when the magician transformed Dracula into 2?

Miraculous. Edited: tough crowd

Fancy Jokes More Fancy Jokes

What's the difference between a regular product and a fancy one?

The regular one says "Made in China". The fancy one says "Designed in the USA. Made in China."

Why did Dracula miss lunch?

Because he didn't fancy the stake.