Why didn't the table want to be sat on?

He wasn't a charitable guy

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

How the fight started Wife : Going for a walk, do you want anything?

Me : How about a newspaper. Wife : OK, which one Me : Today's.

Why did little Jimmy cross the road?

Because he wanted a good view of the front of a moving Porsche. RIP lil' Jimmy

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What do you call a 1,000 pound woman sitting on a bar stool?

A half-ton pickup.

What do you call a number that won't sit still?

A roamin' numeral. :P

Table Jokes More Table Jokes

Why are you guys all sitting on the same side of the table?

DaVinci

What was Lincoln's worst decision as President?

He should have asked for a table, instead of a Booth