Why do husbands typically die before their wives?

They want to.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Where's the best place to go if you want a little head?

The 2016 Olympics.

Who do you want on your basketball team in heaven?

Peter. He can deny Jesus three times.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the sniper say to his wife when he came back from work?

I missed you

Why are gifts in airports so expensive?

God's punishing you for waiting until the flight home to buy your wife a gift.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What did the atheist say when he found himself at the Pearly Gates the day he died?

Well I'll be damned!

Why did the dog die?

It had Barkinsons

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What would you do if I died?

Husband: I would go crazy Wife: Would you re-marry Husband: Ah, not that crazy..

How many women have you slept with wife asked husband, "How many women have you slept with?

he proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."