Why do pigs run from medicine?

They hate getting cured.

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Cure Jokes More Cure Jokes

How to cure affluenza?

Introduce him to Warhammer.

How do you cure the bird flu versus swine flu?

One you use tweetment and the other, oinkment

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why did I join Twitter?

Well I was sick of only being hated by coworkers and family so I wanted to branch out.

What popular board game do dyslexics hate?

Scramble

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What brings you to speed dating?

Me: I just ran out of the fancy shampoo my previous GF bought for me.

Why does Mexico never wins any medals at the Olympic Games?

Because everyone who runs, swims, or jump really well is already across the border.

Pig Jokes More Pig Jokes

What do you call a pig with three eyes ?

Piiig

Why did the pig go in the kitchen?

To start some bacon

Medicine Jokes More Medicine Jokes

What do you call a French dog that sells medicine?

Un phrarmachien!

What kind of medicine do Ants use when they have eye problems?

Ant-Eye Biotics (Dad joke, I know)