Why do zoos pay for simian liability insurance?

To avoid monkey suits

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Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Why do women pay more attention to their appearance than improving their minds?

Because most men are stupid, but few are blind.

What happens if you don't pay the priest who exorcises your house?

He'll re-possess it

Avoid Jokes More Avoid Jokes

What did he tell people in order to make them avoid taking it?

Eschew! Eschew!

What brand should suicidal people clearly avoid?

Nike. Their motto says just "Just do it".

Zoo Jokes More Zoo Jokes

Why did the Irishman buy two tickets to the zoo?

One to get in and one to get out.

Why does the zoo only have dogs?

Because they shot the gorilla