Why does the zoo only have dogs?

Because they shot the gorilla

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

When should a mouse carry an umbrella ?

When it's raining cats and dogs !

Why do we say dogs are man's best friend? Why not say dogs are man's and woman's best friend?

Because diamonds are a woman's best friend.

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

What do you get when you shoot a Mexican golfer?

A hole in Juan

Why do they say "break a leg !" to actors ?

If you said "tear an ACL !" to a star athlete, you'd be shot on the spot.

Gorilla Jokes More Gorilla Jokes

Why do waiters like Gorillas better than flies?

Did you ever hear a customer complain 'Waiter there's a Gorilla in my soup!'

How did the obscene telephone caller get attacked by the Gorilla?

He made a mistake and dialled a preyer!

Zoo Jokes More Zoo Jokes

What do you get when you put human DNA in a monkey?

A lifetime ban from the Zoo

How do you keep getting in here?

ZOO OFFICIAL: Wait. Let's hear him out.