Why does the philosopher have an automatic car..?

Because he Kant drive Immanuel.

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Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why don't pirates drive on mountain roads?

Scurvy

Why do single people take dating advice from other single people?

That's like Stevie Wonder giving Ray Charles driving directions.

Philosopher Jokes More Philosopher Jokes

What do you call the man with a lisp who drowned?

A philosopher. Cuz he's a deep thinker.

What do you get when you cross a philosopher, an insomniac and a dyslexic?

A guy who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog. Infinite Jest, by DFW

Kant Jokes More Kant Jokes

What did Hannibal Lecter say to the philosophy professor after the lecture?

I can smell your Kant.

Why does the philosopher have an automatic car..?

Because he Kant drive Immanuel.