Why is Dracula's favorite subject in school Math?

Because he likes to Count.

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What's love?

Me: Well, all the women text you except the one you like. And it hurts, so we drink. Sister: Get away from him!

What dressing would you like on your salad?

Me: Ice cream

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Why do pirates love football so much?

Cus they love to count YAAAARds.

What do you say to the cashier when you're adamant about using an expired coupon?

dis counts!!

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What is Tumblr's favourite branch of maths?

Trigger-nometry... I'll see myself out.

Why can you never get caught with a 0 in math?

because cot(0) doesn't exist ... This joke... it burns my eyes...

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What do you get if you cross Dracula with Sir Lancelot?

A bite in shining armor.

What is Dracula's favorite fruit?

Neck-tarines.