Why would I want to quit smoking?

Oh, to live longer. Why would I want to live longer

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do you want for your birthday this year?

Vanessa: I want a divorce! Kobe: I wasn't planning on spending that much this year. Here's another ring.

What did the zombie farmer say he wanted?

Grrraaaaiiinnns...

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How do you find out what's in an e-cigarette?

Just ask someone not to smoke it next to you.

What do you call a dictionary that smokes weed?

High definition

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

What is slimy and wobbly tastes of raspberry and lives in the seas?

A red jellyfish.

What do you call the neighborhood where all the poor Italians live?

The spaghetto.

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did this adhesive strip quit his work?

He just couldn't tape it anymore..

Why did the bacteriologist quit her job?

She hated being microbe-managed.