How did God make Himself?

I have to remember to start getting high before bedtime.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How will a black chef start with his recipe?

First we steal two Eggs

What did the three-legged horse do when it started to rain?

It ran to the unstable.

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

What's joke #1?

THIS IS NOT A JOKE I'm sure you all have heard the joke where has a number for each joke and that everyone just remembers the numbers instead for typing out the jokes. This always made me think "What would joke #1 be?" What do you think it'd be?

Why has no one invented a device where I can move myself around from place to place while lying in a hammock?

I remember when we used to make stuff in this lazy country!

God Jokes More God Jokes

Why did god invent patchouli?

So blind people can hate hippies too.

Why couldn't Cain make God love him?

Because he wasn't

Bedtime Jokes More Bedtime Jokes

When is it bedtime at the neverland ranch?

When the big hand touches the little one.

How did God make Himself?

I have to remember to start getting high before bedtime.