How do attractive men pay for things?

They handsome money to the cashier

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What do my iPhone and my girlfriend have in common?

They both go off again two minutes later to remind me of the same thing.

What was the last thing that the homeless man heard before becoming a giant?

Go big or go home

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Which side is it best to lie on?

she asked. "The side that pays your fee" replied the doctor.

Why couldn't Bach pay for his dinner?

Because he was Baroque.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What did the poor composer say to his friend?

I am baroque, can you lend me some money?

When I was young I wanted to date a doctor for money. Can you believe how superficial I was?

Now I would date him for the prescriptions.

Cashier Jokes More Cashier Jokes

Why did the customer slap the cashier?

Because he was checking her out.

When the cashier asks me "Is that everything?

I feel like crap inside because obviously my order didn't satisfy her.