How do you know it's safe to feed the ducks the same thing as the Canadian geese down at the pond?

Because what's good the goose is good for Merganser.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why are jerks nice sometimes?

Standard deviation of the mean (OC, as far as I know)

How does a blind parachutist know when to pull his rip-chord?

The leash goes slack...

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

How is an easily-offended person like a broken GPS?

They always take things the wrong way.

Why do we hit things when they don't work?

Because it worked with slavery

Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

How do you make an idiot think he's a duck?

Tell him he's a duck.

What do you get when you cross a duck with an octopus?

Fired and blacklisted from the genetics industry.

Canadian Jokes More Canadian Jokes

What did the Canadian say when asked what he thought about stereotypes?

Eh.

How many Canadians does it take to change a light bulb?

Just two. One to politely ask and the other to politely help.

Feed Jokes More Feed Jokes

What happens when you keep feeding a cow money?

You get rich milk.

What bounces and makes little children cry?

My donation check to Feed the Children!

Pond Jokes More Pond Jokes

What do you get when you cross a pond and a stream?

A: Wet feet.

What do you get if you cross a pond with snowshoes?

Wet.

Goose Jokes More Goose Jokes

How did Jack know exactly where to find the goose in the giant's castle?

He had her.

What do you get when you run over a goose?

Goose bumps.

Geese Jokes More Geese Jokes

Why when geese fly in a V formation is one side longer than the other?

Because it has more geese in it.

Why is one side of the V always longer than the other when geese are flying south for the winter ?

It's because there are more geese on that side.