How do you know it's safe to feed the ducks the same thing as the Canadian geese down at the pond?

Because what's good the goose is good for Merganser.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How does a black woman know that she's pregnant?

The baby starts picking cotton off her tampons. (aaannnd i'll see myself out)

Why does a girl who uses chewing tobacco give the best head?

Because she's knows what to spit and what to swallow.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Whats the last thing you want to see when youre shagging the wife?

The husband.

What are you called if you are paid to be a thing?

A pro-noun!

Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

What did the Secret Service agent say to the President-elect when someone tried to take a shot at him?

Donald, Duck!

What did the mallard yell in the drive-by shooting?

Duck!!!

Canadian Jokes More Canadian Jokes

Whats the longest running Canadian joke?

Terry Fox

Who do Canadians call when their car breaks down?

Triple, eh?

Feed Jokes More Feed Jokes

What is the difference between an art student and a dead baby?

The dead baby can feed a family of four.

Why did Mitt Romney feed his cows money?

A: He wanted rich milk.

Pond Jokes More Pond Jokes

What's yellow and lies in a pond?

Disclaimer: I don't know how well this joke will work in english. What's yellow and lies in a pond? An excevator. You don't think this is funny? Neither does the operator.

How can you tell a bagpiper with perfect pitch?

A. He can throw a set into the middle of a pond and not hit any of the ducks.

Goose Jokes More Goose Jokes

How can you tell if your goose is depressed?

It's feeling down.

What happens when geese land in a volcano ?

They cook their own gooses !

Geese Jokes More Geese Jokes

What are goosebumps for?

To slow down speeding geese!

When Geese fly in a "V" formation, do you know why one side of the "V" is longer?

There's more geese on that side.