How do you get money out of a piggy bank?

Feed it laxatives.

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Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What kind of money do religious businesses make?

Prophet.

What should you do if windows crashes cost you a lot of money?

A: You should bill Gates.

Feed Jokes More Feed Jokes

What did Putin say when he was finally fed up with Boris Nemtsov?

I'm putin' that guy to sleep

Why can't we feed the animals?

Wife: They'll get lazy and dependent and never, ever go away. Me: *looks warily at our kids*

Laxative Jokes More Laxative Jokes

Why do laxatives always say 'Works gently, overnight'?

What if I want something that works violently right now "

What do you get when you mix laxatives with holy water?

A religious movement.

Piggy Bank Jokes More Piggy Bank Jokes

Where does David Cameron keep his hidden money?

In the Piggy bank

What would a piggy-bank say if it could talk?

Coink! Coink!