How do you offend a white person?

Tell them they can't make racist jokes.

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How can I buy the New York Times?

He replies "Ask my wife. She'll tell you how you do it.

What did the hippy say when he was told to get off the couch and get a job?

Namaste (pronounced:nah I'ma stay)

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How do you know a white person is about to tell a joke?

He's looking over his shoulder

What do you call a Mexican that acts like a white person?

A wiener

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What do you call a group of disabled people in a pool?

Vegetable soup. I apologise to those offended by my terrible joke. Have another Whats the hardest part of cooking a vegetable? Getting the wheelchair into the oven

What's the same about Mexican and Black people?

Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal. (Sorry if you're offended, I love all races.)

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What does a racist joke and a crime have in common?

They both start with you looking over your shoulder.

What are the most racist jokes you know?

There were 3 car accidents in Mexico 70 people died. What do you call a bunch of black people in a swimming pool? Coco puffs.