How do you put a baby to sleep?

You rock them. What if it doesn't work? Use a bigger rock.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What kind of operating system do horses use?

None. Horses are not known to use operating systems nor computers for that matter.

What is cowhide mostly used for?

Keeping cows from falling apart.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What is the hardest part about sleeping with twenty one year olds?

There is twenty of them

Why did the boy take a pencil and paper to bed?

He was told to draw the curtains before going to sleep.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why doesn't communism work in a school enviroment?

Because everyone would get the same Marx.

Why do blondes work seven days a week?

A: So you don't have to retrain them on Monday.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

Where's the baby?

while holding the baby. I can't believe it was legal for me to reproduce.

Why couldn't the baby Jesus be born in Utah?

Because they couldn't find 3 wise men or a virgin.

Rock Jokes More Rock Jokes

Why can't rock climbing instructors get dates?

Because they rappel men and women.

Why did the bear start playing music when the priest tried to absolve him of his sins?

Because the priest said "Bear, atone" and the bear thought he said "baritone" as in "play the baritone sax now". The bear immediately started wailing away on the sax, rocking back and forth so hard he knocked over all the prayer candles and almost snapped his own spine. All the priest could do was ask the lord for the strength needed to get this bear into heaven.

Big Rock Jokes More Big Rock Jokes

How do you put a baby to sleep?

You rock them. What if it doesn't work? Use a bigger rock.

Where's the best place to hide an elephant?

Dad: Where is the best place to hide an elephant? Me: I don't know, behind a big rock? Dad: In a tree silly. Me: In a tree? Dad: When's the last time you saw an elephant in a tree?