How does an Alcoholic teach the ABC's to their children?

Backwards.

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Child Jokes More Child Jokes

Why was the mother flea feeling down in the dumps?

Because she thought her children were all going to the dogs.

What do you call a child afraid of Santa?

Claustrophobic

Alcoholic Jokes More Alcoholic Jokes

What do you call a man who's always in high spirits?

An alcoholic.

What's the difference between an alcoholic and a necrophiliac?

One goes to the bar for a cold one. The other goes to a morgue.

Teach Jokes More Teach Jokes

How do Alabama parents teach their kids to put on their underwear?

Yellow in the front, brown in the back.

What do you call a person who teaches you how to fart?

A tutor.

Abc Jokes More Abc Jokes

Where did the piglets study their ABC's?

At a school for higher loining.

How do pirates sing the ABC's?

abcdefghijklmnopq AAAAARRRRRR stuvwxy and z