How does Jared like to play his flute?

In A minor.

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What do you call an angry white elephant that likes crushing donkeys and darker elephants?

Donald Trunk.

Why did the dog chase the bulldozer?

It doesn't like Cats.

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How do you know when Mexico is playing in the World Cup?

Literally all gardening stops

What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league?

Rink injustice!

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Why was the man arrested for having his skin flute played?

It was in A-minor

Why was the pig unhappy in the Minors?

Because he wants to play in the Pig Leagues.

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What's Jared's favorite ingredient for his Subway sandwiches?

Extra virgin oil

Why did Jared lose so much weight?

He always went for the 6 instead of the 12