How many times does 43 go into 9?

The priest won't tell you, but *he knows*.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How long must I wait for that turtle soup I ordered?

Waiter: Well you know how slow turtles are.

How does an Apple Watch owner know that it's midday?

It's already run out of battery.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What does Taylor Swift tell her boyfriend when he gets toilet paper stuck on his arse?

Shake it off

How can you tell if there is a pilot in the room?

He will tell you.

Priest Jokes More Priest Jokes

What did the priest get at Toys R Us?

An erection.

Why can't priests have children?

Because choir boys can't get pregnant, thank God.

9 Jokes More 9 Jokes

Why was Mel Gibson in a bar at 9am?

He overslept.

What's the difference between one polar bear and 10 polar bears?

9 polar bears (joke on a mug at work. lame, ik)