How many trains have I derailed in all my years as a train driver?

It's hard to keep track.

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Year Jokes More Year Jokes

What is a primate's ideal salary?

A gorillian dollars per year.

What did Matthew McConaughey say to DiCaprio about his chances of winning the Oscars this year?

It's a fugazi.

Train Jokes More Train Jokes

What job do you never stop training for?

Conductor

What do you call a person who falls onto you on a train ?

A laplander !

Track Jokes More Track Jokes

What does train tracks and breast have in common?

They are both ment for boys but in the end it's the men who plays with them

Why did the emo chicken go across the road?

He was afraid to go down the tracks.

Derail Jokes More Derail Jokes

How many trains have I derailed in all my years as a train driver?

It's hard to keep track.

How many have you derailed this year?

I replied, "I'm not sure, it's hard to keep track"

Train Driver Jokes More Train Driver Jokes

How many trains have I derailed in all my years as a train driver?

It's hard to keep track.

What's the difference between a schoolteacher and a train driver?

A schoolteacher says "Spit out that toffee" and a train says "Choo choo."