What did Gandhi say to the British, after they asked him to move?

Nah, mastay

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How, you ask?

I walked into an autopsy. It was stiff.

What did Adele say when asked where her dog is?

Groomer has it

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What did the British proton say after 5 cups of coffee?

I feel positively charged!

What do you call a British nanny with an MDMA addiction?

Molly Poppins.

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What do Jesus, Gandhi and Mel Gibson all have in common?

They all had a brave-heart.

What does Gandhi not like on the Internet?

Salt

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What about "BusinessMyspace"?

Nah, it's taken. Okay, what about "LinkedIn"

What did the Buddhist say when asked if he'd like to move from Tibet to North Korea?

Nah. I'ma stay.