What did Helen Keller say after being handed a cheese grater?

That's the worst book I ever read.

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Why should you never play poker with a crocodile?

You will lose every hand.

Why fist fights break out at NASA?

Sometimes an argument of perihelion will get out of hand.

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What do you call a deaf person who can't lip read?

Anything you want!

What do cats read in the morning ?

Mewspapers !

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What did Helen Keller scream when she got mugged?

Nothing. It was winter and she had mittens on.

Why did Helen Keller try lsd?

Because she was told it makes you see things!

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What did the blind man say when he picked up a cheese grater?

This is the most violent story I've ever read!

What did Helen Keller say after being handed a cheese grater?

That's the worst book I ever read.