What is the chance we are alone in the universe?

Professor: Astronomical.

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Universe Jokes More Universe Jokes

How does the universe throw a party?

They planet.

Why were people in the Medieval times so self absorbed?

Because they thought that they were the center of the universe.

Chance Jokes More Chance Jokes

How do you want to handle your mother in law?

Do you want her incinerated, embalmed or buried -All of them, lets not take any chances

What do you call a blind, legless buck?

No eye-deer. EDIT: I totally messed this joke up. Please give me another chance with another joke

Professor Jokes More Professor Jokes

What happens when you offend a professor of various human aspects?

You owe them an anthrapology

What do you call Professor X doing a wheelie?

Professor + I'm sorry. lol.