What did Jesus say when he was nailed upon the cross?

Me! That hurts!"

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Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why did the crip cross the road?

Chuz

Why did the chicken cross my wife?

Because I ran her over in the street.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What were Jesus' final words?

So long and thanks for all the fish." Edit: Everyone hates me.

Why didn't Jesus play during the Isreal-Palestine soccer game?

He got suspended.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why aren't there any nails in a lesbian's floor?

A. They're all laid with tongue and groove.

What's the similarity between your wife and a tin roof in a hurricane?

If you didn't nail them properly they'll go see your neighbor

Hurt Jokes More Hurt Jokes

Why are blondes hurt by people's words?

A: Because people keep hitting them with dictionaries.

Where does it hurt?

Me: *Points to heart* Nurse: Awwww that is so cute! Me. *COLLAPSES FROM HEART ATTACK*