What did the bartender say to the jumper cables?

You better not try to start anything.

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What's the difference between an accident and a catastrophe?

It's an accident if a boat full of refugees starts to take in water. A catastrophe is if they know how to swim

What's the difference between Bad Jokes and Dad Jokes?

One starts with B and the otber starts with D

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What do you do when an angry pack of clowns confronts you and tries to fight?

Go straight for the juggler.

How does a sloth hang itself?

By trying to jump rope.

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Why does Jesus and bartenders have so much in common?

Bcoz they are single, have no kids, got nailed and serve alcoholic beverage.

What can I get you ?

Harambe: I'll have a beer. Man: No, he'll have just ice. Bartender: Just ice Man: Yes, justice for Harambe.

Jumper Cable Jokes More Jumper Cable Jokes

What did the bartender say to the jumper cables when they walked into the bar?

A: Ok you 2 dont start anything

What's the slowest thing in the world?

A: A Mexican funeral with only two sets of jumper cables.