What did the bartender say to the jumper cables?

You better not try to start anything.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How can you tell if your wife left you?

You get laid the same amount of times but the dishes start to pile up. Hey now!

How do you know when a guy is really in love with his girlfriend?

When he starts using condoms with other girls.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

How does Mario talk to the dead?

With a luigi board. Made this joke up about 10 years ago while trying to think of terrible laffy taffy jokes.

Why was little Billy so sad when his friends played on the swingset?

He had no arms. Sorry that joke was stupid, let me try again. Knock Knock "Whose there?" Not Billy

Bartender Jokes More Bartender Jokes

What does a bartender give you when you need the feeling of a strong drink, but you're not allowed ton consume alcohol?

Xanax since he's a Bartender

What did the Canadian eel say when the bartender asked him if he'd had enough?

No, I think I'd like some more-ay.

Jumper Cable Jokes More Jumper Cable Jokes

What's the slowest thing in the world?

A: A Mexican funeral with only two sets of jumper cables.

What did the bartender say to the jumper cables when they walked into the bar?

A: Ok you 2 dont start anything