What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?

Put it on my bill

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Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

Why were the ducks arrested?

They were selling quack in the park.

Why do ducks have flat feet?

So they can stamp out fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? So they can stamp out flaming ducks.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

What should I buy for dinner?

I see frozen peas are cool this time of year. ..you might say that's a corny joke, but it's really not. It's a pea joke.

What kind of leash should you buy for a Chihuahua?

A short one!

Bill Jokes More Bill Jokes

Whats the opposite of nickle back?

Bill front (Money jokes i got em)

Why do women live longer than men?

Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!

Lipstick Jokes More Lipstick Jokes

Why do they call it "Lipstick?

When a woman can easily move her lips after she applies it

What's the Difference Between Guts and Balls?

Guts is coming home late from the bar, drunk as a skunk meeting your wife at the door with a broom in her hand and asking her if she's still cleaning the house or going out for a ride. Balls is coming home late from the bar, drunk as a skunk with lipstick all over your face and the scent of women's perfume all over you, meeting your wife at the door and stating, "You're next, chubby."