What did the judge do to the lawyer who insulted him?

He got him diss barred.

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Judge Jokes More Judge Jokes

What did the bear say to the judge?

I bearly touched her.

Why was the cannibal fined by the judge?

He was caught poaching.

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus?

Never enough.

Why did the lawyer with a torn ACL still win the marathon?

OC) Because he had the power of a torn knee

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What kind of bar do fish go to?

A sand bar.

Why is a train a bad person to go to the bar with?

Because all he says is "Chug Chug Chug"

Insult Jokes More Insult Jokes

Why was the physicist being so careful not to insult his colleague's choice of generalized coordinates and momentum?

He was just minding his Ps and Qs.

Why shouldn't you ask if someone's a Texan?

Because if they are they'll tell you, and if they aren't you don't want to insult them.