What did the melon say to his daughter after she tried to get married?

You cant-elope!

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What did the husband say to his wife when he tried pushing it in as much as he could, but it still wouldn't fit?

He said "I'm going to try on a different shoe size."

Who said that just because I tried to kiss you at last month's Christmas party, you could neglect to do your work around here?

Secretary: My lawyer.

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Why didn't the melons get married?

Because they cantaloupe...

Why didn't Count Dracula get married?

He wanted to remain a bat-chelor.

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Why didn't the melons get married?

Because they cantaloupe...

What did the one melon say to the other melon?

We're too young to marry. We cantaloupe.

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What are your intentions with our daughter?

Uh I need someone to sing the girl parts of Grease songs with me

How did Bill Cosby find his daughter in the woods?

A: Pretty good

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What did the melon say to his daughter after she tried to get married?

You cant-elope!

Which fruit wanted to run away and get married, but couldn't?

Cant-elope :D