What did the mother tomato tell the baby tomato when the baby tomato was walking too slow?

Honey, walk faster, KETCHUP!

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Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What has a tongue, cannot walk, but gets around a lot?

Steven Hawking

How is my wife doing?

Doctor: I'm so sorry. The accident has left her in a vegetative-like state and I don't think she'll ever recover. She can barely move her limbs, if at all, and will be confined to a bed or wheelchair without the ability to ever walk again. You'll need to care for her 24/7, clothe her, feed her, bathe her, and she'll have no control of her bladder or bowels. Again, I'm so, so, sorry... ..... ..... ..... Just kidding! She's dead.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why are you home so early?

Me: My boss told me to go to hell

What is harder than telling the difference between Chinese people?

Telling the difference between Chinese people with down syndrome.

Ketchup Jokes More Ketchup Jokes

What happens when you mix mustard and ketchup together?

it's must-up ..

What does Ramen and Ketchup taste like together?

Poverty.

Honey Jokes More Honey Jokes

What do bees who are allergic to honey get?

Hives.

Why does Mrs. Piggy douche with honey?

A. Because Kermit the frog likes sweet and sour pork.