What'sApp Me: Mom, what's for dinner?

Mom : typing ... *gets married* *have kids* *gets old* *dies* *goes to hell* Mom: Fish, honey!

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What do you call a woman with six kids?

Lucy

How high are you! ?

demanded the officer. "No Officer, it's "Hi, how are you "." replied the kid.

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

When a guy yells out, "Linda why didn't you give your mom any grandkids?

She yelled back, "Because I swallowed them all!"

What do I have in common with neutrinos ?

We're both constantly penetrating your mom

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why couldn't the man marry the melon?

It was a cantaloupe.

Why don't penguins ever get married?

They always get cold feet! I'll show myself out.

Type Jokes More Type Jokes

Why doesn't Nigel Farage like election forecasts?

He dislikes poles polls How do you type jokes that rely on similar sounding words It hard :(

What type of objects do not accelerate, regardless of the force applied?

Letterhead and envelopes. No matter how hard you try, they remain stationery!

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

What did a disappointed Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he fished up a Salmon?

IT'S NOT A TUNA!!!"

Why can't a fish be a radio host?

Because if he goes on air, he'll die.

Hell Jokes More Hell Jokes

What the hell did you expect for ten dollars?

Lobster "

What kind of buildings do terrorists have on their farms?

Allahu akbarns (I'm going to hell)

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

Why don't lobsters share their dinner?

Because they're shellfish!!!

How do you say dinner in spanish?

JOHN CENA

Honey Jokes More Honey Jokes

What did the Irishman text his Wife?

Honey I'm down at the pub having a pint with the lads. Be home in about 30 min. If I'm not back by then please read this message again."

What really makes Whinny the Pooh angry?

When other people put two fingers in his honey.