What do you call a sacred, flammable piece of wood?

A match made in Heaven.

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Wood Jokes More Wood Jokes

How does a crazy person get out of the woods?

They take the psychopath.

How did Pinocchio figure out he was made of wood?

He was jacking off one day and his hand caught on fire.

Heaven Jokes More Heaven Jokes

What happens when you die?

Me: You go to heaven. 4: No, I mean when you die, do I get your stuff

Why is Stephen Hawking going to hell?

Because it's a stairway to heaven, not a ramp.

Match Jokes More Match Jokes

Why are the new iPhones so skinny?

To match their hipster owners' jeans.

What for ?

Ref: The rest of the match !