What do you call an obese terrorist who plays for the Yankees?

Derek Bin Jeter

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Why aren't Hindu and Chinese people allowed to play hockey?

A: Because everytime they go into the corner they open up a convienent store.

Who should have played Bilbo Baggins in Lord of the Rings?

Bruce Willis. Because old hobbits die hard.

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What do you call a morbidly obese person who can predict the future?

A four-chin teller.

Why are so many people obese these days?

Because burgers are$.99 and salads are $4.99

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Why is it good news that Aroldis Chapman moved to the Yankees?

Because pitchers don't hit in the American League!

What do you call an obese terrorist who plays for the Yankees?

Derek Bin Jeter